Doubting Feminist

Question: I feel pressured to engage in casual relationships to prove myself as a 'feminist,' but I feel so empty. Where is the line?

Dear Doubting Feminist,

In an attempt to be the most progressive generation, we've created quite a contradicting culture—one where casual sex is empowering women, yet still licensed by men. The intention was to normalize women's sexuality and exploration by supporting hookup culture. But in the pursuit of equality, we've misconstrued feminism as 'acting as men do,' and ignored our innate desire for deeper human connection. While some feel empowered by casual sex, many women remain haunted by feelings of guilt, emptiness, and insecurity. That doesn't make you any less of a feminist. Cultivating relationships that acknowledge your needs and seeking emotional intimacy and security are signs of empowerment. Perhaps the least feminist action you can do is being dishonest with yourself and engaging in casual relationships for reasons that aren't your own. 

Life bombards us with so many mixed messages, convincing ones too. Disregard any conventional (or progressive) definition of right and wrong, and instead, focus on aligning your life with ideas that you personally hold true. 

Lots of love,

Gabby xx